So I’m watching Sex and the City and I’m wondering if all women are exactly the same. Are we that whiny? That irritating? That frustrating? That……..doomed? What if Sex and the City is living my life for me?
This is my Carrie inspired “starting off with a question” piece of writing. Were the writers of Sex and the City spot-on because they were able to capture how women communicate, or have women just managed to convince themselves that that is how we talk? I don’t know. Does Sex and the City offer the lessons that women should learn in order to grow and create meaningful and successful relationships with other people? I don’t know that either because to be honest I’m not old enough to know. My life experience in relationships so far is minimal and a lot of the time I’m just running on instinct or emotion. There are really no rules to work with- we just do whatever we choose to do, and when I say we and I’m talking about my friends specifically. My little own posse of gals that I lunch with, shop with, share secrets with, keep secrets with and basically live my life with. We all watch the show and although some friends love it more than others I know we all see the “truth” that the show presents us with.
I don’t see myself as being particularly similar to Carrie or any of the women on this show because really and truly they never change or evolve from the mistakes they make. I like to think that I do. Maybe. Of course that’s wishful thinking because like Carrie I’m in constant need of attention, like Miranda I don’t know if I believe in romantic love, like Charlotte I’m very naïve in some respects in regards to boys and like Samantha…well no, can’t draw any similarities there I’m afraid. But that’s the safety we find when we turn on Sex and the City- although different men come in and out of their lives, although they move cities or apartments, they’re always going to be those same stock characters that never change. And I don’t know that I’m alright with that.
I hate these women when they’re going on and on about nothing- nothing being men mainly. They’re so boring and repetitive but I think I might hate them because I do the exact same thing. Do I do it because that’s how I am or has Sex and the City decided what my interaction with other women is supposed to be like?
I had an interesting experience this weekend. I got opinions on a situation from three different women. Two friends and one mother. One friend was blunt and told me what I didn’t want to hear. The other friend told me that I should go with what my emotions were telling me and the mother told me to do whatever would make me happy. I appreciated the opinions from all different women and I found the reflections on what they each had to tell me was more important than what they actually had to tell me. I think therein lays the success of Sex and the City. It’s not what they’re actually talking about, it’s the way that even in a group that is SO different to my friends they still can all offer up those confusing and polar opposite opinions that you get from your friends. Which is why we keep watching, but I’m starting to wonder if I’m missing the point a little bit.
I get upset with this show because I like it (I won’t lie), but it does sometimes make me feel a bit “not quite up to it”. I don’t think that women like this exist. Well they might- but I sure haven’t come across them. Of course I’m well aware that I’m 21 and my friends are never going to be like the Sex and the City girls because THEY’RE REAL but these are the women that have shaped the way we approach life and relationships. We watch and experience with them and sometimes I think that they’re living our relationships for us. I don’t ever want to be in “the dating game” because these characters have made it look tiresome and horrible. I just want to meet a nice boy and then that’ll be that.
An advert came on during a break for Head and Shoulders and it had a woman on a date who was panicking because she wanted to scratch her head. She ducks under the table to scratch and then pops up with frazzled hair. Mum made a good point: “Have we just got to the point in our lives were we can’t do anything that’s human- I scratch my head all the time.” I feel that way about Sex and the City. It’s too hard to measure up to all those things they’ve already done. The perfect relationships have already been played out on screen so there’s nothing left for the average woman to achieve. I don’t need to wait for my Mr Big because I can just turn on the TV and there he is. Which makes me a little bit sad to be honest.
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